La rentreé is the expression used to signify the time to return to normal life after the summer holidays in France. I can’t wait for la rentreé in Provence when everyone heads back north; the roads become quieter, parking is easier to find, markets are manageable, and a lovely calmness settles over the region. This happens at the end of August, so there is still plenty of beautiful weather to enjoy this quieter period dehors.
However, my own rentreé back to Canada, I am less enthusiastic about. Canada is a fine country, don’t get me wrong. Nothing feels as good for my mental and physical health as Provence.
But this year things felt off. It’s been such a busy year with work; I never got much of a break, and I know that was causing some challenges. My mind was quite often preoccupied with work, sometimes I’d reach the top of a col while riding and not even remember how I got there. I was feeling a general ennui that I couldn’t shake. I know my daily cycles in beautiful places were instrumental in keeping me well, and I was taking in all the beauty as much as I could. Soaking up the searing heat, listening to the cicadas, smelling the lavender while it was in season, and eating all the delicious seasonal produce as possible. I spent lots of time with friends and plenty of time just staring at the views. There were brilliant moments to be sure.
And as always, as I knew my time (a few weeks less this year) was winding down, a sadness began to envelop me. This year, more than ever, it feels like there are fewer guarantees. With the insanity around the globe, who knows what the future holds? I like to imagine, of course, I will be back in Provence, maybe one day for good. But nothing is certain, and the older I get, the less certain I become. I like the wisdom that comes with age and experience. Perhaps it’s just natural, then, when you know how fragile everything is, it becomes impossible to escape the ennui. I just need to embrace it for what it is. How very French of me.
À bientôt ma belle Provence.
